As winter approaches my mind becomes reflective over the past, my present being and my eternal future, Times are definitely changing. I’m learning that no matter my past reprecussions and transgressions the present moment is always the time to come clean through forgiveness of the heart. Being a Mother changes you internally and externally. You learn to become sacrificial and self-less. Adam recently told me that we now share something other than ourselves and through that there’s a solidity of union between two souls. It comes a point of realizing that no matter what happens to us we will always have eachother and we will always have Godric. I have tremendously transitioned from a once meager materialistic atheist girl with an inferior complex to a self-less, sacrifical spiritual universal loving Mother, lover and soon to be wife. Life is magical. I have learned from my trip outside of the internet about my connection with others and i have seen who matters the most to me during this time. My root chakra is soaring with light and my heart is bursting through the seams. I know that during this transitional period it will be hard but we will coarse through these dark storms and awaken into our New Life together. Open the gateway to our new chapter and find the place where we will start living together as a family. Where we will take control of our own Will and manifest the vehicle of change into the positive direction that is calling forth towards us. Adam will find a job he loves and it will be with good pay. I’ll find my calling again and help raise Godric to be a wonderful person who’s as intelligent as his father and as warm as his mother. There will be hope for a new Tomorrow and we will find our place once again. Adam will find his Holy Guardian Angel i know it is merely about thoughtforms and belief. I will find myself again and awaken the inner connection of my solar plexus with my heart which will balance my energy and physicality. I will get back to my pre-pregnancy weight within a year. I know Angels look out for us and despite our hard times the universe is pulling us into a very positive direction of change and hope. It is merely about awakening our Faith and believing in ourselves to walk through the gateway and open ourselves to True Reality.
Parenting is very hard but honestly the most important thing you have to realize is you are the one in control. I had advice being thrown at me constantly left and right while i was emotionally unstable,sleep deprived, hormonally imbalanced and insecure being a new Mother. While help is wonderful, i came to a point where i needed to isolate myself to see that all i had to do was listen to my own heart and intuition. Now everything is better, I have faith in us I am also truly sorry for my transgressions and if i hurt anyone’s feelings through my own unstable period. It was not about you, it was about dealing with my own frustrations and New challenges of Motherhood. I hope you can forgive me, Namaste